By: Jonas Talkington
Week 3 was the hump week for me I think. I was very tired for most of the week, plus finalizing the casting for one movie and getting into the nitty gritty of it for another, plus learning my lines for my next role, plus plus plus. I was working long hours (approx 14-16 hour days) and was just not into expending the extra energy. My water intake declined, although, surprisingly enough, my diet got better and more regular.
I had a weird thing happen to me, food wise, on Friday, though. I didn’t eat hardly anything all day (bad, I know) due to my schedule and the fact that I lost track of time. I picked Galya up from work, and we went out to find a gift for one of her friends for her birthday. As we were going around, I noticed that I was feeling more and more tired by the minute, and that I was having a hard time paying attention to things. I was feeling lightheaded, as well. I finally realized what the problem was. I was getting like Galya does sometimes, nearly hypoglycemic. We sat down and had something to eat (a bunch of random meat) and I INSTANTLY felt better. I mean, it was two minutes and I felt right as rain. Interesting how my body has adapted to wanting food more regularly. Used to be I could not eat for 24 hours and, though I would be hungry, I would be fine otherwise. Not anymore. I am going to have to start carrying a protein bar or a container with dry protein in it around just in case I space it again.
Drama wise, I almost failed this week. Really. All my determination and effort was finally petering out, and I felt like I was facing a difficult and nearly impossible goal. I guess that I was frustrated inside, I don’t know why, but I got into it with Galya at the gym one day. Here is the story.
I have been doing exercise and weightlifting and diet and drinking lots of water and all of the rest of it for nearly a month. That was my usual limit, mentally, before I snapped or gave up or whatever. I had been trying to ease myself into things so that they became good habits rather than chores. One of those things was my workout. I did things that I like to do. Maybe it wasn’t scientifically formulated, nor the best absolute program I could do for maximum effect, but, since I was doing it, and I liked being able to make it myself and see results, it was just one more thing that didn’t make me UNHAPPY doing it (because I am still not crazy about all of this, though I am slowly learning to enjoy it). Well, I walked into the gym on Thursday, and Galya, who was pressed for time, immediately grabbed me and sat down and said “Okay, today, we are making you a program and you are going to do this, this, this, and this.” It was the thing that my subconscious urge to sabotage myself was waiting for. I got mad, was arguing with her as to why I got result doing it my way, and how she wasn’t allowing me any input as to the work I was doing, and how I knew my body, and so on and so forth. It destroyed my motivation for the day, and I got dressed again and left the gym, without working out.
Later, I realized that I was being kind of foolish, but also that since Galya is so much smarter than me about it, that I should never turn down free advice (hey, I trust her enough that I supported her opening her own gym, what kind of idiot would I be if I didn’t listen to her!) and that I should explain to her how I felt. I went back to the gym that night and sat down with her and asked for her help. She was very understanding about it (more so that I expected, actually, considering how negative I had been) and worked with me, instead of for me, to create a program together, that was both smart AND things I liked to do. With all of the testosterone that my body has started to make (or whatever) it has been kind of hard to control my emotions, and I know that I am in the wrong sometimes, but MAN! I have had the urge, the STRONG urge, to rip peoples arms off and beat them to death with said arm, just because they were acting like idiots. I had that urge more than a few times. Of course, all limbs of people around me are still attached, and I have gained control again after the initial surge of emotionalism so that they are just fond daydreams rather than wishes as this point, but it was suprising there for a bit.
After that 2 day hump there, though, I came back into it mentally. I realized that I have successfully passed that point that I have had in every previous abortive attempt to be in shape. I am sure that I will have more, but, as it stands, I had made that first mental hurdle for the first time. I’m very happy about that.
I also had a few good suprises this week. The best was, even though I didn’t go below 100 kilograms (220 lbs.) I went right to it EXACTLY. Pretty big victory for me, and one more pound lost will be a great boost for me. I mean, I will be into the teens. Plus, I had some decent strength gains, although, like I said last week, I worked more on form this week than trying to kill myself with high weight (not that I wussed out though. Galya says my “reduced weight” is an awful lot, more in the realm of crazy than full fledged insane).
Another pleasant surprise was when I had a costume fitting for my next role. They came to me and asked if I wanted to use the same measurements as the last film, and I told them that they had better take new ones, just in case. Boy was I right! I lost a total of 15 centimeters if you add up the losses from all 9 measurements. They were surprised, and I grinned like an idiot. Some things are going right.
Had a refeed again on Saturday. I had spaghetti, risotto, two pieces of bread, 3 small pieces of chocolate, a slice of cheesecake, and half a small container of ice cream. Over the course of 6 hours, mind you. It was GREAT. I have to say, though, that everything didn’t taste as good as it used to, and it made me very bloated and full very fast. That was a very strange thing for me.
All in all, it was a hump week, like I said. I got through it, and my resolve is now firmed up again. I can’t wait to write next Sunday’s Week 4, since I will be writing about new results, a better body and better health.
I just have one favor to ask, though. I have been writing this, every week, and will continue for a while. I would love to get some feedback, though, and tips, criticisms, ideas, or anything else you feel you would have to say about it. Help me help myself. Galya is smart, super smart, but I feel that intelligence goes up exponentially when people work together, it is not just added. I would like to get a little more scientific about it, or have people tell me why I didn’t do something right, or write down my program and have people help me tweak it, etc. I hope it’s not too much to ask. I would appreciate it. I will be trying to keep a daily log online at the forums.
Thanks for reading, and be assured there will be another chapter next week.
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